Life has both its serious and ridiculous sides to it. We need to recognize these as integral parts of living. Life requires a certain amount of seriousness and thought for it to be meaningful, yet at times we also need some levity and humour in order to cope with life and all its seriousness. Knowing how to react to a given situation is an ongoing process in the human experience. With this is mind, and looking back over the seriousness of my recent columns, I find it necessary to put my trusty keyboard to something with a little more levity — stay with me on this.
If you think you are a “sports nut”, try the following for comparison:
• There was Butch Miller who played the longest hole in golf, a 37 mile job in the Nevada desert.
• Then we have a Dr. Jim Wright whose wife said, “The symptoms are an oral diarrhea of scores, players, running speed and statistics. His worse illness is going to Indy (annual 500 mile car race), and back in 36 hours, every year, then watching the race again on TV.”
• Then there was the Brewers baseball fan who received rave reviews for tucking a transistor radio in her bra, so she could follow her team while at choir practice!
• Then we have Susan Torgerson, who said about her fiancee, “My fiancee and I arrived at the wedding chapel in our limousine during a game on the limo TV set. My husband stated, ‘I can’t go in, it’s not halftime.’ At halftime he told the minister, ‘you have twelve minutes!’” Immediately after kissing the bride, he bolted for the limo!
• Nellie tells us about her Joe, “On Super Bowl Sunday we were at church sitting in the middle of the congregation. Joe had his Walkman on and began cheering out loud when the Giants took the lead.. The minister stopped the service to ask my husband the score.”
• Vicki Allen really married a card, a guy named Fred. “For our wedding, she said, “ we proposed to write our own vows in response to the priest’s question ‘do you take?’...etc.” Fred’s first draft, which his wife refused to let him use, went like this: “I will be on the bench for you always, ready to lay down a bunt to help you move along, to ice the puck for you when the going gets rough, and to be always open for your screen pass when the whole world is about to close in. The play is, I do on two!”
Should you come close to any of the above, consider yourself a sport’s nut.
• Heard from a tourist on the Fogo Island ferry one wet and windy weekend recently. The frustrated visitor asks a little boy, “Doesn’t it ever stop raining around here?” The young lad replied, “ Well, I’m only seven years old!”
That’s 30 for this week.
Remember, “It’s easier to build a child than mend an adult and an ounce of pluck is worth a ton of luck!”
Until next week.
Don Winsor is a former recreation administrator now living in Happy Adventure. He can be reached at (709) 677-2422 (voice/fax); or by mail at Box 26, Site 6, Happy Adventure, NL, A0G 1Z0, or by e-mail at